LANDING – HOW DIFFICULT IT CAN BE…

 

WarningThis voice communication does not comply with the International Civil Aviation Organization’s (ICAO) recommendations. However, you can click off, and listen without reading the script on this video in order to jot down this radio communication for listening training purpose:

 

Waterbury-Oxford Airport Map

Click on the map above to enlarge. (U.S. Department of Transportation, Federal Aviation Administration courtesy via Wikimedia)

 

These things happen.

  1. Bearing reported with a ninety-degree error, then corrected;
  2. Uncertainty of the downwind leg;
  3. Traffic not in sight;
  4. Uncertainty as to which airport is in sight;
  5. Requests are said again;
  6. Another airport in the vicinity with same runway configuration;
  7. Traffic off course;
  8. Within half a mile, no traffic in sight, and no radar tracking;
  9. Pilot cannot hear at times or does not reply;
  10. Confusion between ident and squawk;
  11. Pilot does not know how to use the transponder;
  12. Uncertainty of the type of aircraft, then corrected.

Landings may be difficult at times, indeed…

Extraordinary video at JFK airport – AirFranceA380…jostles…Bombardier CRJ700 while taxiing !

This video has become a buzz since yesterday night. The Airbus A380 super-heavy jumbo jet wingtip would have clipped the tail of the CRJ700 according to some reports. The passengers were violently shaken in the cabin of the smaller plane as the Bombadier airplane was instantly pivoted around its yaw axis while… taxiing!!!

Here is the ATC voice communication when the Airbus A380 took out the CRJ700:

… and here is an – outdated – aeronautical chart to understand what happened and where on JFK International’s tarmac:

New-York City JFK international airport chart runways October 2016

Special thanks to Lady E and Xavier for passing the news on 😉

THE PILOT (Willi Willer / Têtes à Claques) with script

Transcript:

Mayday! Mayday! This is Flight DC-one-thirty-two requesting emergency landing « priorité ».
DC-one-three-two what is your emergency?
My onboard agent informs me there is a suspicious passenger on board.
Suspicious? In what way?
He has a nail file.
A nail file?
Yes, and he is filing his nails on my plane!
I do not see the problem.
You know it is against the rules!
Yes, well I would not worry about it.
I wouldn’t worry about it… What if he gouges my eyes out with that file? Who will fly the plane then, eh?
I could fly the plane, Captain.
SHUT YOUR FACE, Henri!
Captain, please, try to stay calm!
No, no, no, no, no… I will not stay calm. OK? Because the passenger also has a canette of grape juice!
So, he likes grape juice…
« So, he likes grape juice… » How do you know it is just grape juice, eh? Maybe there is an atomic bomb in that little canette. Then, what, huh? KA-BOOM!
Look, DC132, I cannot authorize an emergency landing for a passenger filing his nails, and drinking a can of grape juice.
Hey! Tower boy! Do-do you watch CNN, sometimes?
Yes.
Then wake up and smell the jet fuel, huh, huh?
OK! You know, you may be right Captain. We should not take any chances. I am sending two F-18s to shoot you down. Thank you for your vigilance, Sir. We will never forget your sacrifice – Over.
Huh, hello? Hello, tower? Come in, come in, tower?
Well done, « Capitaine »! Smooth…
Tower? This is flight DC132. Hello? Hello?

RAF and Royal Navy HARRIER jets farewell

The Harrier entered in service 41 years ago. Then, the Harrier II (GR5, GR7, and GR9) took off in 1985 for the first time. The F-35 Lightning II or JSF – 5th-generation Joint Strike Fighter – should replace these V/STOL (Vertical/Short Takeoff and Landing) fighter aircraft.

Sixteen RAF Harriers conducted a farewell flypast yesterday while the last four Harriers left HMS Ark Royal forever. Both the Ark Royal and the Harriers are to be decommissioned under cost-saving plans. Click on the video below: