HALLOWEEN WARNING !

Happy Halloween skull

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TRANSCRIPT & TRANSLATION: The 31st of October, Halloween. An Garda Síochána are issuing warnings on a variety of costumes that have been considered naff, grinch, and try-hard:

Le 31 octobre, Halloween. La police irlandaise est en train de lancer des avertissements sur une variété de costumes qui ont été considérés comme ringards, rabat-joies et tocards-flambeurs.

  • the Jack Sparrow costume;

  • the Joker from the Dark Knight;

  • Harley Quinn;

  • the Pikachu Onesie;

These costumes are both unoriginal and unhilarious. They’ve been done to death. Don’t risk it.

Ces costumes n’ont rien ni d’original, ni d’hilarant. Ils ont été faits et refaits. Ne vous y risquez pas.

0’25’’ Gardaí in partnership with the coastguard have intercepted in the last week a large shipment of shite costumes at Dublin Port. In addition to naff and/or twee. Gardaí have multiple reports of lazy costumes.

La police irlandaise en partenariat avec les gardes-côtes ont intercepté la semaine dernière au port de Dublin, une grosse cargaison de costumes de merde en plus du ringard et/ou kitsch. La police irlandaise détient de nombreux rapports sur des costumes décontractés.

0’40’’ In the early hours of the 24th, a man was apprehended carrying four to five refuse sacks, claiming to be: “bin-laden”.

Aux premières heures du 24 octobre, un homme a été appréhendé. Il portait 4 à 5 sacs-poubelles qui prétendait être « bin-laden » (chargé de poubelles).

Also reports of people dressed as Our Lord Jesus, riding around on BMXs.

Egalement il y a eu des rapports de personnes vêtues comme notre seigneur Jesus, se baladant sur des BMX.

It’s bizarre…

C’est bizarre…

I mean Christ on a bike.

Je veux dire le Christ sur un vélo.

1’00’’ Extra Gardaí have been drafted in this Halloween to deal with the suspected increase in wearing of the clown costume from the IT movie which as of this morning has been upgraded to class-A naff.

Des renforts ont été enrôlés dans la police irlandaise pour Halloween pour faire face à la montée soupçonnée du déguisement de clown du film « Ça ». Déguisement qui a été, dès ce matin, reclassé Classe A de la ringardise.

1’13’’ Get down on the ground! Put your arms out. What is this?

Au sol! Ecartez les bras. Qu’est-ce que c’est?

It’s a Halloween mask.

C’est un masque d’Halloween.

Jesus Christ, that’s naff!

Mon Dieu, c’est ringard!

Who’d you buy it from?

Mais à qui achète-t-on cela?

We need to address the recent upsurge in sexy costumes. Garda O’Hara will now read a list of the main offenders:

Il nous est nécessaire de vous avertir sur la recrudescence de costumes sexy. L’agent O’Hara va maintenant lire une liste des principaux contrevenants:

  • sexy nurse; infirmière sexy

  • sexy teacher; professeur sexy

  • sexy nerd; intello sexy

  • sexy… SpongeBob hot pants; pantamini sexy de Bob l’éponge

  • sexy “Where’s Wally”; « Où est Charlie? » en sexy

  • sexy orthodontist; orthodontiste sexy

We would ask any member of the public to come forward with information

Nous en appelons à tous pour nous fournir des renseignements.

  • sexy Garda…  agent sexy…

1’44’’ Thank you, and remember: be safe, be original, but most importantly, don’t go dressed as Hitler.

Merci, et n’oubliez pas: soyez prudent, soyez original, mais surtout, ne vous habillez pas comme Hitler.

  • Or zombie Hitler  ou Hitler en zombie

Or zombie Hitler – it’s still Hitler.

Ou Hitler en zombie – ça reste Hitler.

Special thanks to FOILS ARMS AND HOG for sharing their videos. You can follow them here:

SUBSCRIBE: http://www.youtube.com/foilarmsandhog LIVE SHOWS: http://www.foilarmsandhog.ie

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GENERAL ENGLISH – GROWING A MUSTACHE

General English represents around 70% of aviation English. So, it can be helpful to listen to some general English once in a while. This American English video is not that tough for ICAO level 5 or SLP 3333 speakers but it is a bit fast and full of slang. Therefore, it could be difficult to understand. However, and as it is funny, it is worth watching:

TRANSCRIPT AND EXPLANATIONS:

VOICE:
Pete is a mustache virgin, but lately he has been second-guessing his choices.
Pete n’a pas de moustache, mais dernièrement, il a remis ses choix en question.
THE BOSS:
We are still on for duck hunting?
Ça tient toujours pour la chasse au canard?
WAYNE:
That is the plan, Boss Man.
Absolument, chef.
BOSS:
Hit me back, stache attack.
Rappelle-moi, moustache-attaque. (stache attack, between Mars-attack and stache salute. Stache salute signifie un respect que les sans-moustaches portent aux moustachus)
PETE:
I like shooting ducks.
Cela me plaît de tirer sur des canards.
THE BOSS:
I’m not sure you’re cut out for it.
Je ne suis pas certain que tu sois taillé pour cela.
VOICE:
I know what you’re thinking, Pete – The stached get all the breaks.
Je sais à quoi tu penses, Pete: les moustachus ont tous les avantages.
But one does not move to stached one on a whim.
Mais on ne passe pas à la moustache sur un coup de tête.
You wanna be the lord of the lip, you do it right or you don’t do it at all.
Tu veux être le seigneur de la lèvre, tu t’y prends correctement, sinon ne fais rien.
Are we clear? Good, man. Now take these simple nuggets of wisdom as gospel:
Est-ce clair? Bien! Maintenant, considère ces pures pépites de sagesse comme parole d’évangile:
First things first. You can’t just grow a mustache.
Commençons par le début. Tu ne sais tout simplement pas comment te laisser pousser la moustache.
Waiting for it to get to the good looking stage takes way too long.
Attendre que cela ait bonne allure prends beaucoup trop de temps.
And it is a tad creepy in its incubation phase. Best to grow out a beard first.
Et puis, elle a un peu de quoi faire peur (a tad: un peu) dans sa phase d’incubation. Mieux vaut d’abord se laisser pousser la barbe.
Hold back the mustache for its official debut.
Ne te presse pas pour l’apparition officielle de ta moustache.
Quick side rule:
Petite règle en apparté:
It’ll be pretty clear if you have the chops for facial hair during the beard stage.
Ce sera bien net si tu des favoris lorsque tu porteras la barbe.
If you look like a Yeti with a hormone disorder, you may want to consider a different way to get in touch with your manhood.
Si tu as l’air d’un yéti avec des troubles hormonaux, il est peut-être préférable que tu reconsidères ta façon d’aborder ta virilité.
Once your little friend has fully matured, you may not immediately recognize yourself in the mirror.
Il se peut que tu ne te reconnaisses pas dans la glace lorsque ton compagnon pileux sera arrivé à maturation.
That’s because this baby is more than just hair. It’s attitude.
C’est parceque cette merveille est plus qu’une chevelure. C’est une attitude.
Embrace that.
Comprends bien cela.
Care to live the life of a big game hunter?
Envie de mener la vie d’un chasseur de gros gibier?
Wanna ride your new hog into the sunset?
Envie de rouler sur ta nouvelle Harley Davidson au crépuscule?
Wanna sell antique cars to Italian businessmen?
Envie de vendre des voitures anciennes à des hommes d’affaire italiens?
Those bristles under your nose open the door to a lifestyle the stacheless could never pull off.
Ces poils sous ton nez ouvrent la porte sur un mode de vie que les sans moustaches ne pourraient pas imaginer.
Now, Pete, you may be eager to show off your new accessory.
Maintenant, Pete, il se peut que tu brûles d’envie d’épater la gallerie avec ton complice.
Better to let your new look That’s because this baby.
Mieux vaut laisser ton nouveau look parler de lui-même.
THE BOSS
Nice duds, Tex! How about you come visit my ranch this weekend?
Chouettes fringues, Texan! Et si tu passais à mon ranch ce weekend? (a Tex is a tall man, often attractive, a little weird with a sense of humor and usually good at guitar)(attention: duds, ce sont aussi des UXO, unexploded device or munition, aussi toute personne qui a quelquechose qui cloche et enfin tout appareil qui ne fonctionne pas correctement)
WAYNE
I like horses.
J’aime les chevaux.
THE BOSS
Good for you, Wayne… Good for you.
Tant mieux pour toi, Wayne… Tant mieux pour toi.
KENNY
The stache has spoken. Until next time, enjoy being a man who gets the tough things done.
La moustache a parlé. Jusqu’à la prochaine occasion, réjouis-toi de faire partie des durs.

You can watch this video and subscribe to The Guy’s Manual

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GREETINGS from C-5 AIRCRAFT, SHAKESPEARE, AND… CHUCK NORRIS

Hi there!

Dear readers, it’s high time I sent season’s greetings, and a happy new year to you through this video:

In this amusing video, a voice-over quotes Hamlet, act 1, scene 1:

Some say that ever ‘gainst that season comes
Wherein our Saviour’s birth is celebrated,
The bird of dawning singeth all night long;
And then, they say, no spirit can walk abroad,
The nights are wholesome, then no planets strike;
No fairy takes, nor witch hath power to charm,
So hallowed and so gracious is the time.

Then, the voice-over adds:

So, I brought you that… Merry, merry Christmas, and happy new year to you all.

The voice-over quotes Marcellus’s cue from the original version of Hamlet:

It faded on the crowing of the cock.
Some say that ever ‘gainst that season comes
Wherein our Saviour’s birth is celebrated,
The bird of dawning singeth all night long.
And then, they say, no spirit dare stir abroad.
The nights are wholesome. Then no planets strike,
No fairy takes, nor witch hath power to charm,
So hallowed and so gracious is that time.

…, which roughly means:

It faded away when the rooster crowed. Some people say that just before Christmas the rooster crows all night long, so that no ghost dares to go wandering, and the night is safe. The planets have no sway over us, fairies’ spells do not work, and witches cannot bewitch us. That is how holy that night is.

Here below a translation from François Maguin’s bilingual book in both old English, and French:

Il a disparu au chant du coq.
On dit que toujours, lorsque vient la saison
Où l’on célèbre la naissance de Notre Sauveur,
L’oiseau de l’aube chante toute la nuit.
Alors, dit-on, nul esprit ne se risque à sortir,
Les nuits s’en trouvent pures, nulle planète ne frappe,
Pas de fée ni de sorcière qui puisse jeter un sort,
Tant la grâce vient sanctifier ce temps.

Video from Valentin Bajkov © Delov Digital, www.delovdigital.hu

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When mice take the Mickey out of airline…

Mouse in commercial aircraft
Mouse - Photo © George Shuklin, Wikimedia.org

It first happened on Monday September 5, 2011. A Nepal Airlines flight was cancelled at Tribhuvan International Airport, Kathmandu.

Do you guess why? The flight attendants spotted a stowaway mouse onboard their B-757 bound to Bangkok! The small rodent fled from the galley’s pantry, and rushed from a box of drinks to the back of the cabin although the 113 passengers did not notice the tiny stowaway.

The mouse was finally caught thanks to a glue trap. The jetliner was grounded for more than eleven hours.

 

Then, the same Boeing 757 – this time bound to Kathmandu – was grounded at Hong Kong International Airport on Tuesday September 6, in the evening.

The reason: the pilots spotted a mouse in the cockpit just before the airplane departure. The aircraft has not been cleared to take off because this mouse was trapped but then escaped, and would still be on the loose. The 84 passengers were rerouted on a Dragonair aircraft.

 

As far as flight safety is concerned, an aircraft cannot take off with a mouse moving freely onboard as it can gnaw the wiring, and therefore represents a potentiel danger.

It can only be caught or trapped. However, NAC (Nepal Airlines Corporation) could not poison any mouse for a small animal can damage an airplane even if it is dead somewhere, and particularly if in contact with a vital part of the plane.

 

Special thanks to Mr Hermas, and LadyEleanorA who buzzed this piece of news.

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Heavily-striped pilot on enormous traffic pattern

…or how to learn with humor – watch the video:

Special thanks to DeltaDart48 for stumbling upon this video starring Paul Bertorelli in this « flying lesson ». By the way, who sells such stripes on E-bay?

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